I’ve written about high-tech sex before, but since then, the world has come a long way in terms of sexing up our smartphones.

Generally I have a “no-phones-in-bed” rule but maybe I might reconsider for a few of these…

Glassy Sex.

This Google Glass wearable tech let’s you see yourself having sex “through your partner’s eyes.” This is 99 percent always a bad idea, even if you and your partner look like this:

 These guys should totally be on BoyfriendTwin (whose name should probably be DoppelGangBangers) 

3nder.

I don’t know how to pronounce this, but the purpose for this app (brought to you by the Tinder and Grinder folks) is to allow you to find people to have a threesome with without having to poach experimental-looking singles at a bar with your boyfriend in tow. Not that I’ve done that ever.

Dickorate.

This app has actually recently been removed but I still want to talk about it anyway because it’s redickulous. This dick-dressing app let men take pics of their junk, make them bigger (obvi) and then add weird accessories, like sunglasses and little dick sweaters. They can then send the pics to their lover, who will undoubtably use them as blackmail later on. Here’s a true story: Nobody wants your dick pic. Ever. Also it reminds me of this hilarious video which will get suck in your head for days.

Sock-it.

Okay as someone who once had twelve room-mates, I actually kind of like this one. If playing “Big Papa” on repeat for 43 minutes didn’t make things clear enough, this app lets you alert people when you’re having sex so they leave you the f*ck alone.

Do you use any helpful sex apps? Would you use 3nder? Are you a little bummed Dickorate is no longer a thing?

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*This post was originally written for iEatGrass.com.

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