I prefer their Austin Armacost Campaign…

Well, PETA has completely outdone itself. The animal rights organization has long been known to use sex to sell veganism, using porn stars in their ad campaigns, launching their own “porn” site, and having sexy activists in bikinis hit the streets in the name of animal cruelty. Last V-day, they made a big sexy deal about the benefits of going vegan with their campaign BWVAKTBOOM, meaning “boyfriend went vegan and knocked the bottom out of me.” The campaign—which some grumbled was a bit too violent—claimed that if your man goes vegan, you better wear a helmet and goggles because his baby batter will be so spunky it may damage your corneas. No really. Brace yourself.

But now, in honor of world vegan month, they have unleashed this video featuring men of all ages gyrating to a techno beat hung with giant phallic vegetables.

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With great anticipation throughout the past 6 months, PETA’s new porn site went live last week, www.peta.xxx.

The site, which showcases porn stars touting animal welfare (spay and neuter, folks!), is controversial for a variety of reasons, and many wonder if it is helping or hindering the cause. I mean, PETA has long been known for ridiculous, media attracting tactics, and no one can argue that sex sells. Remember their V-day ad that claimed vegans had such good sex, we need helmets and knee pads? Apparently “good” sex equals rough sex, and they (jokingly, mind you) said women should wear safety goggles so as to avoid getting blasted in the eye with potent vegan man seed? Or what about their awesomely raunchy super-bowl ad that shows women having a good time with their veggies?

As someone who is an advocate for both embracing sexuality and veganism, the new XXX site does amuse me. But some may argue it makes the cause look a bit ridiculous by clearly attracting attention for a not so sexy cause, through sex appeal. The site features Jenna Jameson, legend Ron Jeremy, and a personal darling of mine, Sasha Grey.

The site draws you in with promises of nudity and then slams you with some other graphic images that are not so sexy (think animal cruelty), so it is definitely an example of using sex to sell your point. But is this bad? I mean, all the cool kids are doing it, right? I also can’t help but wonder if all the porn stars on the site are actually vegan…if not, that would seem hypocritical. When Jenna Jameson says “Pleather yourself,” is she then going home, or to her next film set, to don actual leather?

If you click the “Why Nudity?” link on the site, PETA explains itself:

PETA’s mission is to put an end to animal suffering, and we use every available opportunity to spread this message—we always have, and we always will. Unfortunately, this is not always an easy task. Unlike our opposition, which is mostly made up of wealthy industries and corporations, PETA must rely on getting free “advertising” through media coverage. It’s a safe bet that many visitors to PETA.xxx didn’t set out to learn about how animals are mercilessly slaughtered on today’s factory farms; understandably, such topics are convenient to ignore. That’s why PETA must make our message impossible to forget—and launching a website with a .xxx domain name is one way that we can achieve that goal.

While the site gives me mixed feelings (to be honest, I think it is more R rated than XXX) what I really like about it is the “Sex Tips” page. When I first clicked it I was expecting some Cosmo-inspired babble, but it talks about how what we eat affects our sex drive, and goes over a bunch of different plant-based munchies we can take to fire ourselves up. Love this.

SO what do you think? Is this a good move for PETA, or no?

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Uhm, PETA released this interesting website just in time for V-day: Living with BWVAKTBOOM. That really long acronym stands for “Boyfriend Went Vegan and Knocked the Bottom Out Of Me.” Basically the entire site is dedicated to “tips” about how you can get ready for the insanely super-charged sexual prowess of your newly vegan boyfriend. I suppose this is in hopes of getting men to ditch meat and dairy. Remember when Jason Mraz blogged last month about how going vegan has super-charged his sex life? Or how about this trending Meme of Ryan Gosling sans shirt talking about straining tofu through cheese cloth—wetting the panties of vegan ladies all around.

MmmmNmmm

The PETA powered site gives tips to “sex proof” your house by mounting TVs on the wall and covering sharp edges; using industrial strength condoms; investing in a sex helmet and my very favorite tip? Cum goggles. What? “I quote: Your newly vegan boyfriend is sitting on a sexual howitzer. Protect your corneas from his turbocharged loads with OSHA-approved goggles.” Protect your corneas, people!

The site is meant to be funny! I get it!  But lots of vegans are pretty cranky about it because it has nothing to do with animal rights, which is what PETA is all about. Also it is sort of celebrating violent sex and PETA is all about non-violence. Actually, in case no one noticed, PETA is pretty aggressive. If PETA was a dude, he would come at you fast and hard and not stop until you’re unconscious, dripping with sweat and have finally conceded to throwing out all of your leather boots. NOT MY LEATHER. Calm down, people! The site is clearly  just a ploy to get men to go vegan. But what about women? Every woman wants to have killer mattress moves, too! I’ve never been with a vegan guy so I can’t vouch for their stamina but I can say that since I went vegan I have more energy in every aspect of my life, so of course this translates to the bedroom. Plus my body feels better, which gives me more confidence.

And as for BWVAKTBOOM? I don’t care how good the sex, I do not want anyone to ever, ever “knock the bottom out of me.” Shudder.

Watch the commercial to see this poor girl walking around like she just got gang-banged and hear about how her boyfriend went vegan and could suddenly “bring it like a tantric porn star.” Oh boy. Poor Jessica. Note how she went out to get him a nice bag of Romaine ever after he pulverized her lady bits with his super-charged lettuce-munching robo-cock.

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I just finished reading Jonathan Safran Foer’s Eating Animals, and boy, did it fuck me sideways!

I thought I knew things about things! I mean, obviously I knew many terrors of factory farming, one of the largest reasons I don’t eat meat! But I can’t really stomach all those scary PETA videos so I don’t watch them because they give me nightmares, like the time in college I had to drop anatomy because I developed severe anxiety over the thrice weekly cadaver lab where I had to slice and dice an old dead lady that reminded me of my Nani!

Anyways, I love Foer’s fiction which was part of the reason I picked up the book. I once listened to Everything is Illuminated while driving to Va, and it may just have been the hilarious accents the guy reading the tape put on, but those 8 hours flew by. Foer, a life-long on again off again vegetarian (commitment issues!), starts researching factory farming after the birth of his son, as he is wondering what to feed him—meat, or no meat?—and where the food comes from. At the start of his journey Foer is a locavore, picky about where his meat comes from, but still eating it. By the end, he is a full on vegetarian. The book has some startling statistics, and it will be hard for me to hold my tongue the next time one of my good intentioned friends says “oh I only eat fish because they have no feelings.” (People don’t like to hear about their food being tortured, so I usually don’t rant about animal abuse  unless provoked…)

The title of the book states not only the obvious, that we eat animals, but also that WE are ANIMALS that EAT. It has great themes about food as the bond between people and traditions and families, about the importance of sharing a meal together and what it symbolizes, and a sprinkling of amusing anecdotes and Foer’s general easy-reading style of writing. Also, the first chapter makes a convincing (satirical) argument on why, common sense-wise, if we were to eat any animals, it should be dogs! Outrageous!

For some reason, whenever I refer the book to people I call it Feeding Animals instead of Eating Animals. I even wrote it a few times in this post and had to correct myself! I suppose I like the image of me at a happy farm feeding a sweet big-eyed cow some grass rather than me with a steak on my plate. Anyways…

Read it! Go!

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Eat Your Veggies!

I love when sex and vegetables come together! Well, no, not actually, that’s not true at all, veggies should be kept in the field, the fridge or on your plate. But I do love when I get to talk about sex and veganism simultaneously.

Peta recently had their Super Bowl ad, which stated that vegetarians have better sex (duh!), banned for being too racy. Basically, the ad was of a ton of hotties gettin’ all hopped up on and about their vegetables. The video was rejected by NBC for reasons such as woman licking pumpkin, rubbing pelvic region with pumpkin, touching breasts while eating broccoli and more.

This display of public food erotica reminds me of Paris Hilton’s cheeseburger commercial for Carl Jr’s that was definitely not banned, despite its racy content.

Sheesh, why does everyone wanna hate on the veg-heads? Peta is just tryin’ to get the game-watchers to put down their buffalo wings and munch on some celery instead..their hearts, wallets, waistlines, and the planet would all thank them. Just ask Oprah!

Watch the video, and check out Peta’s Veggie Love feature to learn more and watch some previous Peta videos that were too hot for TV.

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Ben found a grey hair on my head last night. Instead of being terrified, here is a short list of women that make me excited about getting old.

1. My Mom..I once read an article about how to avoid looking like your mom as you age, and it made me angry. My mom is still super sexy, and I would be stoked to look like her in my 50′s.

2. Sue Johanson. I remember watching her late night  show, Talk Sex With Sue, in highschool.The woman is  hilarious, so up front and in your face. Seriously, she isn’t phased by anything, and I can only guess how old she is. I still love to watch clips from her old shows on Youtube. You get it, Sue…

3. Hannah showed me this woman,Mimi Kirk, on Vegnews.com. PETA had a contest of sexiest vegetarians over the age of fifty, and seriously, look how hot this woman is for a seventy year old!  Actually, I believe she turned 71 in September. Talk about an inspiration. She has been a vegetarian for forty years, so if I do my math right she started at thirty. This means that  if I am still a vegetarian (or vegan!) by the time I am seventy, I will be in even better shape since I already have a head start on her. She has seven grand-kids! Holy hot grandma….

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