If this doesn’t make you at least a bit fuzzy I worry about your ability to feel emotion (Photo by Nilesh J. Bhange. www.nileshbhange.com)


Thanks to all who entered my First Ever Contest, where I asked you all to send me your favorite sexy meal suggestion, your favorite pre or post sex ritual and/or try to pick me up on Twitter with an awesome one liner.

The winner from the comment entries was too hard for me to decide so I went to Random.org for a random number.

The winner was reader Angela, who I will be emailing as soon as I finish posting this!

Her response?

A Sexy dinner would be papperdell pasta with a creamy vegan white sauce, because the way it slides across your tongue and its thick and wide. Its easy to make dirty talk when eating this. For presex fun, my husband and I go to coconut oil (extra virgin…lol!) for slippery good times.

From the Twitter entries, the prize goes to @sweetpotato222 for her winning pick up line:

The fact that this is her ONLY tweet and I am pretty sure she created a Twitter account just to Tweet me  basically won me over. Plus she is clever and hot and I am shallow and easily impressed. Boom!

The winners are going to receive packages from me including my favorite Astroglide products, my favorite Blossom Organics products, and my favorite Filthy Farmgirl products, which I have reviewed in the Stuff I Get Off On section.

Stay tuned for another contest! Want to see if I get off on your products? Send them my way so I may shamelessly endorse you! Gotta love a hobby that pays in lube…

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I am excited to be holding the first-ever contest here on SexyTofu! I have some amazing sexy stuff to give out, all products featured in Stuff I Get Off On. There are two ways to win, and two winners will be chosen; feel free to enter both ways to up your chances. Winners will get a fun SexyTofu approved box filled with Astroglide products, soap from Filthy Farmgirl’s raunch line, and a few other surprise goodies. Here are the following ways you can win:

Entry One:
– Subscribe to SexyTofu over there on the right!
– Follow me on Twitter @SexyTofuBlog and tweet me an all-star pick up line (get creative!) with #Contest in it so I know what you’re after, and the following shortlink so that you spread the SexyTofu love : http://wp.me/pJxw4-AB

Entry Two:
In the comments section below, tell me one (or both) of the following:

Your favorite pre or post sex ritual. This can be as stereotypical as the post-gasm cigarette (bad bad cancer!) or an inventive way you and your partner get steamed up or cooled down. Rituals can be simple, like saucy pillow talk, or inventive. Ever thought about dumping warm noodles all over your naked body? Want your lady to go down on you while you watch Godzilla on a projector screen? What?! Some people have vivid imaginations and really nice butts. Get creative!

The go-to meal you would prepare for someone you are trying to impress, because we all know that—aside from nurturing your body and enjoying delicious food—the main reason you like to cook is to impress people. Especially people you are hoping to sleep with. I’m onto you!

Contest will run from today until Wednesday the 25th! Check back on the 26th to see the winner.

I encourage you to try and come up with the most interesting, creative answer possible. Or you could make up a bold-faced lie—I will probably never know.

..Not this kind of contest

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Okay, I know what you’re thinking.  Another post about lube! But Astroglide—hoorah for vegan lube!—recently put out a survey about the most popular bedroom fantasies and published the results! Their top responses were as follows: Getting’ it on somewhere exotic, doing a dude (or lady) in uniform, sex in public, taking control and having more than one person at once. None of those are really all that surprising, so here is a list I have cultivated through very extensive and professional research. (Getting my friends drunk and harassing them with inappropriate questions about their sex lives.)

Audio Arousal-Lots of people use music to set the pace, but what about having one person wear a pair of those huge hipster headphones while their partner picks the tunes. With only one half of the party listening, it feels secretive, making things a a bit more interesting—for the one listening at least. Take turns switching off.

Bon Voyeur! - A bit creepy but still hot. Hide in the closet (or peek around a shower curtain) while your man or woman comes in, undresses, and gets down to business solo. Come in and help out if you want.

Ravishment- Also known as “play rape.”  This can be appealing for both the dominating and the dominated. However, for obvious reasons, it can be dangerous, so always have a code word. Blueberry! Also maybe a code hand signal, in case for some reason you can’t speak. Uh…what?

Pants Down in Public—Similar to putting out in public, this one entails being caught givin’ yourself a little TLC in a public place, and then having a stranger or acquaintance walk in on you and offer to give you a helping hand. Very risky because it would be more likely that the stranger would offer to call the cops…

The Home Wrecker – This involves shakin’ the sheets with someone who has children, while the children are in the house. Knowing you need to be extra quiet makes it extra juicy.

The Drive By- This one involves driving side by side with a huge truck and touching yourself while the trucker watches. Cool in theory I guess, but I make 9 hour drives down south (hah, no really!) all the time, and all the truckers I pass are seriously creepy. Once a friend had a trucker pull a video camera on her, and all she was doing was driving! So imagine where she would have popped up on the internet if she was givin’ her passion pit a playful poke…

Lost in Translation—Sexing up someone who doesn’t speak your language. Actually they also specified it was a maid or house keeper who doesn’t speak their language, but I veto that part of the fantasy because I CAN. I think it would be hot to pick up anyone and somehow convey nonverbally that you want to remove their clothing with your teeth. Also then you could say hilarious things to them mid coitus and they wouldn’t understand you.  I HAVEN’T BATHED IN 2 DAYS SO I HOPE THAT TASTES NICE. Oh, gross.

What do you think of my friends’ fantasies? Weird? Hot? Sociopathic? Oooh, or be super ballsy and tell me some of your fantasies! I wanna know know know!

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