Nothing beats a good homestyle massage. On the receiving end, they feel amazing. But even if you’re the giver, massages are a great excuse to touch one another. I don’t need to write anymore about massages feeling great—even a terrible massage is usually pretty good.
Up until recently, I had only been into dry massages, as massage oils are messy and also remind me of the opening scenes of really cheesy porn. Many of the massage oils I tried in the past were heavy, and made me want to shower immediately after. Not so sexy.
However, I have recently discovered that I do like massage bars. Containing your oils into an ingeniously convenient bar form makes it difficult to overdo it on the slippery front.
My first encounter with a massage bar came from Lush Handmade Cosmetics, who makes a great vegan line of massage bars.
When I first used my bar, I was a bit confused as to what method I should be using. It came in a cute little tin, and the bar itself looks exactly like soap. Do I just rub it on my hands and then proceed to massage? Do I massage WITH the bar? Where were the directions!? To experiment, I just kind of plunked it on my dude’s naked back. However, as I moved it to the side, I had an Aha! Moment.
Lush massage bars are made out of cocoa butter, and this is the reason they are so amazing. You see, cocoa butter is solid at room temp, but melts at body temp, so when you slide the massage bar over skin, it leaves behind a delightful trail of slick goodness for you to rub in.
Because the bars are made out of wholesome ingredients, you can take your massage down a dirtier path without having to worry about rubbing chemicals all up in your business. The bar that I have is the Under the Covers bar. The name alone subtly says “use me for sex.” It smells, according to manfriend, “like Easter.” (Jelly beans, anyone?) Unfortunately, it was limited edition, so you can’t get one. I’m the worst, I know. You CAN, however, get some of their other bars—I recommend the Friend with Benefits bar, both for the name and also because it’s scented like chocolate AND flowers.
My Under the Covers bar has been stationed on my bedside table since its first use, and has been seeing so much traffic that it will probably be gone soon.