So, I will admit I am purposely behind on technology. I spend all day on the computer, and as a result I have been refusing to get a smart phone, because then I know I would be habitually stalking my ex, er, catching up with friends on Facebook while on the go, checking work emails, obsessing over vegan boots (mmm, fall!) or watching mundane YouTube videos, and I just can’t have that. So anyways, you can imagine why I would shy away from this new vibrator that comes with a USB stick in it.
Produced by the San Francisco based start-up, Crave, this new toy—dubbed the Duet—is made from silicone and metal and has two motors (thus the title). That all makes sense, but please tell me why it has a USB stick in it? I know Americans are all about multitasking, but is it necessary to store that presentation you’ve been anguishing over for work on a device that you march up Mount Vahooha? I mean, really.
The company claims it is discreet, waterproof, and silent, which all sounds great. But if I am going to have a multi-purpose sex toy, I’d rather it do something aside from store the contents of that novel I will probably never finish. Oh, like how about a sex toy that doubles as a projector so it could shine your fav naughty flick on your bedroom wall while you have yourself a party? Now that’s inventive. Someone go invent that, because I am far too lazy to do it myself.
(I am totally full of crap. I want this product and am bashing on it because it isn’t vegan and therefore I know I will never buy it. Perhaps I should get Paypal on this site so you can give me money to fuel my vegan sex toy research fund, now that I am boyfriendless and all. Just sayin’.)